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Jul
22
answered How can I dig conflict out of an optimistic SF-nal premise?
Jul
22
comment Is it necessary to make clear “when” an event occur in a flashback?
Well, you might be able to do it with paragraphs, but honestly, it's the kind of thing I usually find has to be considered in the context of the whole story. Saying "later that afternoon" is fine if you know what day it is, but I've worked on books where I've gone four chapters without being able to figure out what month I'm in, so "that afternoon" is insufficient. I can't tell you whether your question is too large for this site.
Jul
22
comment Is it necessary to make clear “when” an event occur in a flashback?
There's no way to tell without context. Everything around these statements will affect whether the reader has a sense of time or not.
Jul
22
awarded  Custodian
Jul
22
reviewed No Action Needed How do I improve my knowledge of English well enough to write in it?
Jul
22
reviewed No Action Needed How to decide whether or not to accept publishing offer for short story?
Jul
22
reviewed No Action Needed How much can I talk about other people's works?
Jul
22
reviewed No Action Needed What steps can be taken to avoid libel / copyright issues in social commentary?
Jul
22
reviewed No Action Needed What is a good OCR program?
Jul
22
reviewed No Action Needed How does one involve people in writing non-fiction?
Jul
22
awarded  Custodian
Jul
22
reviewed No Action Needed How do I keep up with current written English language?
Jul
22
reviewed No Action Needed What are some good instruction manuals for writing short stories?
Jul
22
reviewed No Action Needed Should I indent the first line of the first paragraph in a chapter?
Jul
22
reviewed No Action Needed What is a normal length for a chapter?
Jul
22
reviewed No Action Needed How should I break up chapters in a novel?
Jul
21
comment Does it sound more natural to use the character's way of speaking while describing his/her inner thoughts?
@AlexandroChen I'd have to see a larger piece in context, but my first impulse is to stick with my original answer: you can have something set in a 5YO perspective if the entire scene is that way. The extended example is not the entire scene; it's just one beat from her perspective. For me that would be jarring.
Jul
20
reviewed Reject What are some examples of modern original plots?
Jul
20
comment Does it sound more natural to use the character's way of speaking while describing his/her inner thoughts?
@PaulA.Clayton Let me know if my edit addressed your question.
Jul
20
revised Does it sound more natural to use the character's way of speaking while describing his/her inner thoughts?
added 2419 characters in body