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visits member for 3 years, 8 months
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Nov
13
comment Worried that my opening is not gripping enough
@what Thanks for the suggestions. After ten revisions, I decided to leave it as: "I still couldn't believe An-Mei had come to a spiritual retreat. She was the last person I could imagine to join one. But as I made my way uphill I could see could see why she had chosen this place..."
Nov
12
comment Should I italicise when the protagonist quote other character's words?
Thanks. The quote occurs just after the the previous scene. So I guess I should go for the unitalicised version.
Nov
12
comment Should I get rid of short sentences that don't provide much information?
Thanks! I'm also a The Oatmeal fan.
Nov
11
comment How can I catch more errors when I proofread?
@what OK, I'll try that next time.
Nov
11
comment How can I catch more errors when I proofread?
@what Well, maybe it doesn't happened to everyone. Here's an article about it: ramonadef.wordpress.com/2012/09/20/how-to-avoid-typo-blindness (like many others)
Nov
11
comment How can I catch more errors when I proofread?
@what I think writer's usually develop some kind of error/typo blindness the more they read their work. I read mine like 10 times and the errors/typos people found had nothing to do with my grammar.
Nov
9
comment Does this opening paragraph grab your attention? (very normal setting)
@dmm Oh thanks. Ha, I wrote this long long time ago. I almost forgot it existed.
Nov
8
comment When to keep the passive voice and when to remove it
Oh, thanks for clearing the confusion. For some reason, I thought the passive tense was the use "was/were" in a sentence.
Nov
6
comment Rhythm in the following passage
@Derfder more like the middle part.
Oct
30
comment As an new author, how important is to have a personal website?
Is it common for fiction authors to regularly update a blog?
Oct
29
comment Short story cover: “a story” or “a short story” or not putting anything at all
@CLockeWork 9,300 words. Well, yeah, Amazon tells you how many pages the ebook has. But in that case, the customer has to click the product in order to find out whether it is a novel or a short story.
Oct
26
comment Worried that my opening is not gripping enough
Thanks, you gave me a good idea for an opening.
Oct
17
comment Should I edit the first draft until I'm totally satisfied or should I leave that to the third draft?
Thanks for your feedback. Sorry, I think I wasn't clear enough. By satisfied, I meant something like: "OK, looking good. I'll come back to it in the next draft." As opposed to: "Mmm, this doesn't look good. It's OK, I'll fix it in the next draft." I'm aware art can't be perfect. Like Leonardo said: "Art is never finished, only abandoned."
Oct
15
comment Structure of a good summary
Thanks for the feedback. Well, the story never reveals why she missed the earthquake. That part is open to interpretation. The whole earthquake thing is a kind of metaphor for the story anyways, so it doesn't have a definite answer.
Oct
15
comment Structure of a good summary
@John Smithers Thanks! Not sure where the w went.
Oct
14
comment Structure of a good summary
@cornbread ninja Yeah, I was worrying about that. OK, I'll do some editing.
Oct
14
comment How can I avoid word repetition in the following paragraph?
Thanks! I think this is what I was looking for. I think it works perfectly well, since "Earth" and "earthquake" are recurring motifs in the story.
Oct
14
comment How can I avoid word repetition in the following paragraph?
OK I'll try. Not sure whether I will succeed, though.
Oct
11
comment Rhythm in a list
How about the edited version I added?
Oct
11
comment Rhythm in a list
Thanks! By last item you meant the last item in the sentence or the list? Will the piece flow better if I use the same pattern in the last sentence?