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If you try this technique and find that it's clunky or confusing, you might want to frame the whole story with a narrator who is reading over the main character's diary and explaining it for the benefit of an eventual reader, giving context. This sort of device is often used when the author needs a lot of exposition, but the character would never give it.


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I'm a 16 year old who often writes for fun so I don't know how much my opinion would matter. But I were to be in your situation, I wouldn't edit anything. That way the character's thoughts don't become you're pet peeves. Don't cross out anything, keep the handwriting and everything else. If the journal the that the jailbird is writing was supposed to be read ...


0

I can't answer for the American system of essay writing, if there is one. However, I studied History and Philosophy to University degree level here in the United Kingdom and I was definitely expected to write in what you call the "British" style. In other words, we were expected to report both sides of the argument fairly (to show we actually understood the ...


2

my favorite fight scene of all time is when David Webber has Honor cut a guy in half with a sword. The whole fight is one stroke of the sword. On the other hand the whole book is about a fight centered around that single stroke of the sword. Webber's Honor books are a great examples of the fight following and influencing the politics. It is not that the ...


3

Approach this the same way you approach everything else. Some books contain eating and cooking to an extent that you could recreate the exact meal, if you wanted, others just let the reader assume that the characters eat, without mentioning it at all. War is no different. Make up your mind what your story is about. That is what must be told. A detective ...


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There are two basic applications of this technique: serious and comedic. In the serious version, your character changes opinion about given passage while writing it. It tells about character development, how their view of things changes through introspection and reminiscence. My best friends gave their lives for this country the wealth of the oil ...


3

When I was young and started to write, I was so in love with the process of writing that I thought to publish that process. I made a huge effort of recreating my notebooks into a layout program, with all the crossed out words, the notes in the margins, the sideways and upside down text. I got that book printed, and it looked very fine and interesting. I gave ...


7

I am not convinced of your premise that people don't read books for action scenes, nor that numerous fighting scenes are "just bad writing." I'd argue that knocking a character out just to skip an action scene is bad writing. The Hobbit certainly had battle scenes, I remember one where Gandalf was turning pine-cones into fire bombs. Tolkein's The Two Towers ...


3

As to a good way to skip the action scenes - what you have seems fine. It's basically just that - skipping the action scenes. Say 'he slew the monsters,' and you can technically stop there. However, I think you're going about this wrong. Fighting scenes can be tedious in a book. Does this mean you should skip them? No, it means you need to know how to ...


1

Gael Baudino sort of did this in her Water! trilogy. In the three books (O Greenest Branch, The Dove Looked In, Branch and Crown) she kept switching not merely narrator and POV, but the entire narrative style: parts were standard narration, then parts were being told by a marketing guy as he was getting mugged, then parts were a stone-cutting manual which ...


1

Samuel Delany does this effectively near the end of Dhalgren, but only for fairly brief passages. As with any stylistic innovation, you have to make it worth the reader's effort to adjust to it. Remember, "realism is just another style." I would use this sparingly and only for things you actually want to convey to the reader, not just for the sake of ...


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When I am writing a manual, each topic has its own headline, whether the text beneath it is a paragraph, several paragraphs, a procedure, etc. If your subtopics can't support their own headline, then consider that they are really the same topic.


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Your use of "something" is a bit of a literary crutch. Most writers have them in one way shape or form. Since you have have identified this particular issue, now would be a good time to correct it. As others have already noted, the word "something" is just a placeholder. By itself it literally means nothing. I'm not saying that "something" should be banned ...


0

Every writer has certain phrases they repeat "this", "what I did", "and then", "some sort of". Mine is "some sort of". Where and how you employ these phrases have to do with your style. It would be a sin to omit all of them. It would be excellent to keep them where they fit. "something" isn't anything to omit, it lets the reader put whatever they want ...


0

The reader is going to supply their own emotion. If you've strung everything together correctly. But writing with 'feeling' is a slippery idea for the ages. Certainly there must be some emotion driving the writer to write the words. The fact that a thing was written is sometimes enough. But sentimentality is the cheap knockoff that often ends up as a ...


1

I will second CLockeWork's comment. I will also add that while parentheses work, I think commas are more readable. John said it was constructed in 1664, during the Dutch occupation in Taiwan, by an admiral that had decided to settle in the island.


1

Others may disagree, but I'm a big fan of parentheses. In this case, the Dutch occupation is a side note to give some context to 1664. It could be omitted without changing the real meaning of the sentence. John said it was constructed in 1664 (during the Dutch occupation in Taiwan) by an admiral who had decided to settle in the island. Please note, I ...


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I know this is an old article; however, I came across this and wanted to add something. While it may seem illogical or that there isn't a right or wrong answer, you must remember the focus is to make the document grammatically correct. Your question can best be answered by revisiting the basic definition of a proper noun. While we would say "figure(s)" is a ...


0

John said it was during the Dutch occupation in 1664, in Taiwan, that an admiral who had decided to settle in the island, constructed it.


1

Adding to Dale Emery's answer, and maybe clarifying it a bit, I would say that the tense depends on the narrator. If the story is narrated by an omniscient narrator, then the ocean is vast, because that is what the timeless and universal narrator knows about it. If the story is told from the perspective of the protagonist, as he experiences the events, then ...


2

If you're deeply in the character's viewpoint, it doesn't matter that a sentence is expressing an everlasting fact. What matters is that it is what the character is experiencing at this moment. Of all the things the character could be thinking about, this is what he is thinking at this moment. So you write it in the same manner as the rest of the character's ...


1

Different fonts have been created for different purposes, and you should select a font depending on that purpose. Helvetica and Times, for example, are common fonts that have been created to be easily readable in print. Arial and Verdana, on the other hand, were created specifically to be easily readable on a screen. Both Arial and Verdana look ugly in ...


2

The language in your question is very clear and doesn't seem to use the staccato approach found in your example sci-fi piece. Why not write your sci-fi piece with your natural language, that you seem to have used for your question? I believe that would solve your problem, because you seem to be a clear concise writer -- from your question's example. If ...


1

The following is quoted from Harvard Guide to Using Sources When you are citing an edition of a book other than the first edition, you should indicate the edition. In both MLA and APA styles, you should identify the edition you are citing by year or number (if either is available), or by name (if the edition is listed as "revised" or "abridged"). ...


1

Short answer: If the font is easily readable, then it's fine. I wouldn't obsess over this. I'm sure psychologists and marketing people and psychics are convinced that choice of font has profound implications on the effect your material has on readers. Personally, I doubt it. Unless the font is unusual enough to stand out, unless readers see the font and ...


-1

This is a mistake I've made in the past: "Show, don't tell" is actually a dictum of writing for the screen. Given that movies are a visual medium, it's generally a mistake to spend a lot of time with the characters (or a voiceover) telling you things that could be dramatized. However, great books (and stories) can and do often "tell" us things that ...


0

It sounds like your teacher used Freytag's pyramid, which is something of a standard in analyzing Western literature. If that isn't it, I think you are going to have to 'fess up to your carelessness, as Chris suggested.


2

I think it depends on the piece and on what it's for. Most people will highly advise using headers for blog posts, for instance, because search engines LOVE them and they're useful for skim-readers. Generally you wouldn't use headers in a novel, short story or poem, but that's not to say that you can't or that it hasn't been done. When it comes to academic ...



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