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All German language forums for writers as well as most forums for fans and writers of specific literary genres have subforums where you can post your own work and receive critique. Use any search engine and search for either "Schriftsteller Forum" or "[your genre] Forum" (e.g. "Fantasy Forum"). A few examples: http://www.dsfo.de/ ...
I found the site wortkrieger.de (formerly kurzgeschichten.de) myself. But I don't know if it is functioning well and I didn't find information about how this site works in the FAQ section. If anyone has experience with this site please add a comment.
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