New answers tagged fiction
There's Fablelane for ultimate short stories that have been co-authored by the entire community. You could start your story there, or read the existing stories. Many of them are adventures and fiction.
I made up some nice thrush species! White-tailed Sporcler Great Blueback Sooty Saw-wing Nutmeg Hawking Thrush Maritime Thrush Spatulate-tailed Thrush Mountain Flannelwing Desert Flannelwing Rockhopper Bluebird Greater Yellow-crowned Bluebird Orange-footed Cactus Robin Gray-eared Robin Common Purplechest And finally... Westheimer's Undulating ...
I think your first example is perfect, making sure that you drop out words from the speaker to indicate the passage of time as your foreground characters are talking "over" the speaker. It makes perfect sense to me as a reader what's occurring.
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