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You can insert narrative into dialogue wherever a speaker might pause: "You," she finally looks at me, "have been," her finger touches me on the chest, "much too reckless with my heart." She pushes me away and stands. "Go!" She points at the door. "And don't come back." Where the speaker pauses will depend not on syntactic rules but on what makes sense ...


The problem is that the prose in the middle is stage business, and there are only so many times you can interrupt with stage business. I think you have to punctuate the non-dialogue bits as sentences, not interrupters. “Dawn once told me about a problem she once had with her step-mother." Wendy cast a furtive glance at Dawn, to check that she was ...

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