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4

I think the problem is, too much of the latter style will be tiring on a reader's eye and "ear" (they "hear" the characters speaking as they read). It's sometime laborious too because they have to figure out how to pronounce weird things characters say. Gone with the Wind is a drastic example of this, because Margaret Mitchell did just that when writing the ...


3

No, a character telling a long story is not by default an info dump. The key to making sure it's not just clunky exposition is to make sure it is not a case of 'as you know, Bob' by which I mean one character should not be telling another character something they already know. An example of this would be experienced police officers explaining procedures to ...


2

An infodump is when the author has to get a whole bunch of important information to the reader, but it's not integral to the plot at that moment. If Character 2 is ranting and finally getting something off his chest, it's not an infodump. It is the plot. It's the culmination of the plot. To keep it from being a wall of text, break it up with stage business ...


2

"It's about time we got going, don't you think?" "It's 'bout time we got goin', don'tcha think?" Both these guys sound the same to me. They both have my voice, they both have my accent, and I suspect that accent is a few thousand miles off where it's supposed to be. The problem is, one took much longer to scan than the other. When reading a page we do not ...


2

No it should not be an info dump. The story continues. The only thing that should change is you switch to the character’s voice instead of using your own. You might think of it as though your reader is going to put down your book, pick up a short story written by a character in your book and read that, and then pick up your book again. As a writer, you can ...


2

Grammar Side-Rant (Ignore at will) First off, none of the words you have in bold are gerunds. A gerund is a verb form used as a noun. Examples would be: Hunting is a sport. We love sailing. Answer: As far as overdoing it goes, your paragraph sounds fine to me. However, looking at one paragraph is not the same as looking at the whole page. ...


1

If you're concerned that you're using too many, then after you're done your first draft, go back and search for any -ing words. Replace them at least half the time. So: I couldn’t help thinking to myself, who is this woman on the phone? And if it’s not Burns’ mother then why does she want to speak with Burns? Monica’s purse rattled again and I walked ...


1

I enjoyed James Whitcomb Riley and Joel Chandler Harris (Uncle Remus) when I was a kid. But as an adult, I find it tiring to read. I think writing in the vernacular should be reserved for characters with VERY strong accents or dialects. And still, it would be better to find a way to write the sentences in plain English, but use grammar and word order instead ...


1

Strike a balance. Your character who speaks in dialect uses different vocabulary, word order, grammar than the person who speaks in the Received Standard version of the language. Non-Dialect American English: "Can I come see you tomorrow?" British English: "Shall I knock you up?" Brooklynese: "I'll come call f'you." Only in the third one would I change ...



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