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I was wondering whether it is okay to write like this or not:

I never went for the grooves. But I did take a seat near the bar table and checked out the pretty ladies. Drinking was not my cup of tea. Alcohol. Alcohol was not my cup of tea. Wait, let me reframe it. . . I did not drink.

Can I write sentences like these - 'okay wait, let me reframe it. . . I did not drink.'

Share some light?

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closed as off topic by Neil Fein Nov 29 '12 at 4:20

Questions on Writers Stack Exchange are expected to relate to writing, copywriting, publishing or editing within the scope defined by the community. Consider editing the question or leaving comments for improvement if you believe the question can be reworded to fit within the scope. Read more about reopening questions here.If this question can be reworded to fit the rules in the help center, please edit the question.

Proofreading requests are off-topic here, I'm closing this. – Neil Fein Nov 29 '12 at 4:22
I wish I could downvote moderator decisions. This is not a request for proofreading a specific sentence, this is a question about using certain tools of style. – SF. Nov 29 '12 at 9:12
@Neil, actually, this was not proofreading. – Amin Mohamed Ajani Nov 29 '12 at 10:25
I can see if this is closed for being subjective (which it is) but it's not about proofreading. – Lauren Ipsum Nov 29 '12 at 10:59
@JohnSmithers I like your title change. – Lauren Ipsum Dec 3 '12 at 17:33
up vote 5 down vote accepted

"Is it okay..." and "Can I..." are subjective. It's about context.

Are the sentences grammatically correct? Strictly speaking, no. But you are clearly writing in a first-person, casual, stream-of-consciousness dictation style, so they are perfectly fine for that.

Speaking as an editor, as long as this is your character's/narrator's voice, and you're consistent, I would be entirely fine with this type of writing, and wouldn't mark it up to be "fixed."

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Thanks Lauren. This is what most of the youth in my country like. Hence the writing style. :) – Amin Mohamed Ajani Nov 29 '12 at 10:26

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