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I am writing my statement of purpose. I have endeavored my best to overcome any grammatical errors. However I am not satisfy with it. Please can you review my statement of purpose given bellow? I will be thankful to you. The more my SOP will be clean the more I have chance to get admission. Please do a kind on me


Statement of Purpose On my career plan, I hope to work in Computer Labs as research scientists or be a professor in university. After accumulating enough research experience, I will consider turning into Management field or a consultant. If I have enough resources, I'll try to create my own business. So I'll need to get a Master degree in Computer Science first. Information technology and computer science is a young discipline and for my country it is too young. In a very short time it has changed the world. IT in Pakistan is not gaining attention as it needs to be. Specially, the quality education in computer and information technology related fields never got attention.

My interest in computer science dates back to my school days. During high school, I was fascinated with electronic gadgets. Soon thereafter, designing and building basic circuits started as a hobby. Along the way, however, I realized that the problem-solving aspect of making electronic gadgets was what I enjoyed the most. During the holidays of Higher Secondary School examination I joined a computer learning center where basic computer was taught. Computers were new things those days. After few weeks of joining the center I come to know about computer programming. I learned about HTML and then JavaScript and so on.

During college days I kept studying and learning computer continue. I started writing more complex software applications which leads me to work as freelance software developer. I used to help under graduates students to write their assignment related software. Before taking admission in computer science graduation I leaned many programming languages like C, Visual Basic and JavaScript/HTML. So Computer Science was a natural career choice after this.

The first year lectures of my undergraduate were about freshman courses which I was already familiar with, however, in consequent years, the versatility and facile nature of Computers made it even more interesting and really left me spellbound and enthralled. This solidified my interest in Computer science and exposed me to the enormous potential of this developing field. As the depth of studying about computers increased, it helps me to widen my background in various concepts. I also paid special attention to vital subjects I would deal with in my professional life. During my undergraduate studies subjects like Algorithms, C++, Artificial Intelligence, computer networks interested me the most. In parallel with studies I served as computer teacher in a secondary school where I enjoyed teaching programming to students. As I was fascinated by AI and the autonomy of computers so I took more interest in data processing and computer security. That is why I developed computer security related software as final project which let me expose my skills and caused great popularity and I was highlighted in the media.

Work is my main source of learning. After completing graduation in Computer Science I moved to Lahore to utilize my technical skills and joined a software company where I fully implemented what I have learned during graduation with great professionalism and enthusiasms. Where I had the opportunity to work with experienced personnel. Within few months I was promoted as lead developer increasing my responsibility technically as well as managing other engineers. Currently I am working as senior software engineer in Pakistan’s largest open source software firm.

I have strong background on open source and .Net based languages. My main interests are Artificial intelligence, Human computer Interface, Image processing, distributed and cloud computing.

So, for the sake of my curiosity of research in computer I chose German universities as my dream carriers. My relation to Germany also goes back to my childhood. At that time, I used to listen Radio Deutsche Welle. I tried to learn German by the radio so I wrote letters to the Radio they sent me Urdu to German learning books which was used as reference books while learning thing by the radio.

The most inspiring technology I observed in Germany is the computerization SDI implementation at the local administration level of Germany. If I have the opportunity to study in Germany, I will study the system and will endeavor my best to adopt the same technology in my country. The German ICT industry is ranked fourth worldwide after the USA (27.8 percent), Japan (8.8 percent) and China (7.1 percent). Germany has the most internet users in the EU. Around 56 percent of the German population and 44 percent of German companies buy products and services online - significantly more than the EU averages of 37 and 27 percent respectively. So, to have an opportunity of study in such technology oriented country will definitely be great experience for me.

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I'm sorry - as per our FAQ, grammar and proofreading questions are explicitly off-topic here, and will be closed. You can read the full discussion on the subject: meta.writers.stackexchange.com/questions/301/… – Standback Nov 19 '11 at 18:12
Hmmm, then who will use this sit? – Sarah Nov 19 '11 at 18:16
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That remains to be seen :P But the site is meant to be a Q&A site about the challenges and difficulties in writing (and associated occupations); to a large extent, it's meant for people who have a specific question they want answered - it's less oriented towards improving specific pieces of writing, and explicitly avoids "please proofread this" questions. You can see previous popular questions for a better sense of what Writers.SE is about. – Standback Nov 19 '11 at 18:23
@Sarah - while this site does not allow proofreading, you can ask for other types of critiques that focus on specific questions about your writing. There are many examples under our critique tag. – justkt Nov 21 '11 at 16:46

closed as off topic by Standback, John Smithers, justkt Nov 21 '11 at 16:46

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